Ahh.. the big yellow bus! For some parents, it is the end of summer and the beginning of FREEDOM. For most homeschool parents, it becomes a threat to remind their children about how good they have it at home. For me, sometimes it seems to be the answer to the tired worn out homeschooling momma I have allowed myself to be… I am going to be completely transparent with you. I have had days where I questioned everything I did! Thoughts would float through my head as I witness my public school friends on Facebook showing off their perfectly dressed kiddos on their first day of school. Everything appears to be so perfect! Children are smiling and happy as they wait for their school bus. Soon they will be surrounded by friends and opportunities that are way out of my budget. To me, it seems like it could be the perfect solution to my insecurities of homeschooling at that moment.
And from the very depths of my homeschooling momma heart… I begin to wonder if all the struggle is worthwhile. The early mornings, late nights, and absolutely no time in between. Is it all worth it? Am I giving them enough? Are they lacking because of me? Will they have what it takes to get into college? The questions come at me at a speed that would make the hyperdrive seem like time standing still.
The enemy takes advantage of my vulnerability and adds to the thoughts…”Are you really capable of teaching them all they need to know?” My thoughts can become a slippery slope that escalates quickly and draws me toward a big black hole of unbelief. The big yellow bus suddenly becomes my magical chariot that will make everything easier. For a moment it seems as if I found the answer…and right at that moment, my homeschooling calling smacks me in the face, reminding me why I do what I do. I know that at this time of my life, I am called to homeschool my young children.
God didn’t put me on this path of homeschooling to do it on my own. He placed us in this path so that He can lead and guide every step of the way. Where I am not qualified, He gives me grace and places in my path someone who is. When I am feeling wanting of something, He reassures me in the smallest of ways. It may be a friend, a stranger, or my husband that has to grab me by the shoulders and speak life into that moment of doubt. Yes, He has always been faithful to have the right person speak into my life at that moment.
Friend, I write this to let you know that you are everything God wants for your children and that you can do this! So, the next time you see a big yellow school bus, just imagine it to be a big yellow banana peel that may try to slip you up. 😉